As I type this blog I am covered in Benadryl due to a pelthora of mosquito bites, I'm carefully placing my dusty feet on my clean sheets, and I am charging all of my electronics praying that "dumsaur" doesn't occur again this evening. Dumsaur is the twi word for off and on. They refer to the power outages as dumsaur because the lights go off and eventually come back on. So far this semester the power outages haven't been too much of a problem. They've made cooking weekly meals at Tracy's flat difficult (Tyler and I made burgers without power) but most of the time the power is out and hour or so and comes back on. The past two nights around dinnertime dumsaur has happened...
I wish I could bottle up all of the feelings that flood into my mind when I'm laying on my bed, already sweating, and I hear the fan slow to a stop only to realize that my phone is at 32% and my computer is at 19%. What this means is movies are not an option and neither is playing games on my phone. The thing about dumsaur is one never knows when its gonna end. It could last 30 mins or 30 hours. There is such a feeling of defeat knowing that for the next of hours there is literally nothing to do. I wish I could give those feelings to my many friends and family back at home who have no idea what that's like.
Then there's the heat. I want so badly to bottle up what it feels like to sweat constantly. I wish I could accurately describe what it's like to go to bed while sweating, wake up while sweating, sweating the instant you turn the shower off, and basically all the times in between. I have been sitting in a church sermon, or a lecture completely overcome with heat. Imagine being in a room of a couple hundred people, minimal fans, doors and windows open with zero breeze, the heat envelopes you and in some cases you feel like you can't breathe cause the heat is just sitting on you. Everyone should know that feeling.
Most importantly, I wish everyone knew what it was like to be an international student, or the stark minority. I have been laughed at countless times for simply asking a question, I have had my picture taken while walking on the street or laying on the beach, I have been stared at relentlessly. I wish my majority friends understood those feelings. Those things have happened simply because of my skin tone. When it comes to being an international student I can assure you that it is the hardest thing I have ever done. It is terrifying to take classes where you can barely understand the professor, you don't understand the lecture style and you can't seem to find people who are willing to go out of their way to help you transition. It's extremely confusing and utterly exhausting to have to have your attention dialled in at all times. To behave in culturally appropriate ways, get good grades and find friends? It's a monumental task. It is in my Calvin group or the other American/European international student that I seek refuge, comfort and rest. It is just easier to be in a group of people who get it. When I'm sitting with my American friends at lunch I don't have to constantly be on guard to ensure I behave appropriately. It's only after this experience that I can fully appreciate the International students at Calvin. I commend you. To the Ghanaian students at Calvin, thank you from the bottom of my heart for all of your support and advice you've given to us! Thank you for answering our questions, calming our nerves and connecting us with your friends and families here in Ghana.
My experience here as a student isn't over, I still have finals and classes to finish up but in about two weeks I will transition to an internship at a school/orphange called Haven of Hope. This is my practicum placement for the Calvin program. I am so incredibly excited to work alongside teachers and caregivers at Haven of Hope. As of today I have 40 days left here in Accra before I begin the 24 hour journey back home.
